Monday, August 17, 2009

THE LONG CON

Or, Pandora's Guns & Ammo

[Originally Aired February 8, 2006]

Flashback to Sawyer humping some woman. He tells he loves her and then rushes out to a meeting. While he's on the way out his briefcase opens up and $150K in cash tumbles out. Oops. Except this woman doesn't fall for it. She picks up the cash and sees that it is fake. Sawyer congratulates her from figuring out his con. The woman, Cassidy, tells him she has no money, that he's wasting his time, then asks him to teach her how to con. In the hatch, Jack locks up the suitcase full of guns and asks Locke about the Heroin Marys. Locke says he too superstitious to bust them open. He tells Jack to put the medicine in here too, saying Sawyer's been stealing painkillers. The two agree that neither of them will open up the gun keep without talking to the other first. Meanwhile, Sawyer gives Charlie a hard time about getting booted out of Claire's tent. Charlie tells him to mind his own tent, and Sawyer turns around to see Jack ransacking it. Jack takes the bottle of meds he finds saying they belong to everyone and Sawyer gets in his face. Kate visits Sawyer's tent as he's trying to put it back in order and gives him a magazine from the Seventies. Sawyer can't read it since he lost his glasses in the boat explosion and so Kate reads to him. Sawyer says he's on the outs with Jack. Then he tells her about the army Jack is building. Kate is surprised. She is on the outs with Jack too, it seems. Hurley tries to cheer Sayid up by giving him the shortwave radio Bernard had. Sayid tells him to get lost, he doesn't need cheering up. Hurley apologizes, but leaves the radio with Sayid anyway. In another part of the jungle Ana and Jack discuss the trouble they're having finding recruits, and Ana believes it is because everyone feels too safe. Jack disagrees. Sun tends to her garden, and is attacked. Someone throws a sack over her head and ties her up. Sawyer and Kate hear her screams and run to the rescue. They find Sun has been hit over the head. Cassidy and Sawyer pull another short con, ripping off some rubes at a gas station. Cassidy wants to try a bigger con and confesses to Sawyer that she really has $600K stashed away. Sawyer suggests they give up pulling cons and just run away somewhere. Sawyer hauls unconscious Sun back to the beach and there is lots of panic. Ana believes it is the Others. Jack says they made a truce with the Others. Jin wants a gun. Sawyer is wary of Ana's claims, hinting to Kate that maybe she attacked Sun to get people scared. In flashback Sawyer meets his conman partner at a diner in Iowa. Kate's mom is their waitress. Sawyer tells his partner he doesn't want to rip off Cassidy. The man threatens to shoot them both if he doesn't. At the beach Kate realizes Ana is angling to get the guns and sends Sawyer to the hatch to warn Locke. Sawyer tells Locke to change the combo but Locke figures that is a temporary solution and takes the guns and hides them somewhere else. When the group arrives to take the guns Jack finds the store empty. He asks Sawyer where they are. He doesn't know, he's been manning the button while Locke moved them. Back at the beach, Jack finds Locke sitting by the fire and accuses him of breaking their earlier agreement. Locke says Jack was about to do the same thing. As they bicker, there is gunfire. And Sawyer walks out with a rifle. He says that while he was on the raft trying to save them all, everyone stole his shit and he's pissed. Worse yet, they let Jack and Locke tell them what to do all the time. Sawyer says if anyone wants a gun, they'll now have to see him. Later, Kate asks Sawyer if he abducted Sun. He denies it, and considering Kate was with Sawyer when Sun was abducted, it's a pretty dumb theory anyway. Kate is convinced nonetheless that Sawyer conned her. Back in Iowa, Sawyer is frantic as he enters Cassidy's house. He tells her he's been conning her all along, but he doesn't want to take her money now. He points out his partner's car out front and tells her the man will kill them both if he doesn't come out with a briefcase full of money. He takes her money out of its briefcase and stuffs it into a duffle bag and tells her to sneak out the back door. They'll rendezvous later. Sawyer takes the empty briefcase and gets in the passenger side of the car. The car is empty. After a few moments Sawyer returns to the house and pulls out another duffle bag. It's full of Cassidy's money. He heads back out with it, the con a success. On the beach, Sayid shows Hurley that he's rigged up the shortwave to a new antenna. They pick up some Glenn Miller from lord knows where. Or even lord knows when, Hurley suggests. In the jungle Sawyer meets up with Charlie and hands him a Heroin Mary for helping him. Charlie tells him he can never let anyone know he abducted Sun. Charlie refuses to accept the heroin, saying he'd have taken it earlier if that's why he helped. Sawyer asks him why he did it. To make Locke looks like a fool, he says. Charlie asks why Sawyer did it. "I'm not a good person, Charlie. Never did a good thing in my life."

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