Monday, December 28, 2009

THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE HOME - PART 1

Or, Lies (And the Lying Liars Who Tell Them)

[Originally Aired May 15, 2008]

A plane flies over the ocean. The copilot rubs his rabbit's foot. Bad mojo with their cargo he says. The pilot tells their passenger they're about to land. She gets up and heads to the back. Her name is Decker and she's played by Michele Forbes. (Of course. First you're on Homicide, then you graduate to Oz. From there you end up on either Lost or Dexter. Or maybe one of the Law & Order spin-offs.) She moves to the rear of the plane. Jack, Hurley, Kate, Aaron, Sun, and Sayid sit in the cargo hold. The Oceanic Six. Okay, I guess Aaron was the sixth. That's stupid. Wevs. Decker tells them their families are waiting. And the press. But they don't have to talk to the reporters if they don't want to. "It's fine," says Jack. "We just want to get it over with." The plane lands, they disembark. Hurley runs to his parents. Sun hugs her mother and father. Jack meets his mother. Hurley introduces Sayid to his folks. Kate is alone. Back on the beach Jack and Rose and Faraday discuss the radio they were just dropped. Jack tells Faraday to call the chopper. Faraday turns on the monitor and hears Keamy telling his team to deploy to the Orchid. Jack asks Juliet what the Orchid is. She doesn't know. Jack tells Kate to get some guns, they'll follow the chopper. Juliet tells him he's being a jackass. "I promised those people that I would get them off this island." Faraday pulls Charlotte aside. "They're using the secondary protocol. We have to get off this island. Right now." Jack and Kate head through the jungle and Kate points out that Jack is bleeding. He says it's just his suture healing up. She calls him a liar. Miles and Sawyer stumble out of the brush. Kate asks what happened to Claire. Sawyer says she disappeared in the night. They spent a day looking for her, but were hoping she went back to the beach. She didn't. Sawyer tells them the people from the freighter attacked the barracks and killed everyone. Just like Locke said they would. He suggests they head back to the beach. Jack says "I put Sayid and Desmond on that chopper. It was my call. It's my responsibility. I'm going after it whether they're on it or not." He heads off into the jungle. Sawyer follows him saying "You don't get to die alone." Seriously, every time Sawyer says something like that I love him a little more. Cut to an airplane hanger. The Oceanic Six sit on a stage, microphones in front of them. Decker points to a map and explains what happened: "Based on the location of the wreckage, our best estimate of the crash site is here, in southern Indonesia. From there, the survivors were carried by the ocean's current to an uninhabited island in the Lesser Sunda Islands known as Membata. A typhoon washed up the remnants of an Indonesian fishing boat, including basic supplies and a survival raft. On day 108, the remaining six survivors, including Ms. Austen's baby which she gave birth to on the island of Membata, used this raft to journey to an island called Sumba. They then came ashore near a village called Manukangga." They open the floor to questions. Jack is asked to describe the crash. Sun is asked if her husband died on the island. "No, he never made it off the plane." What happened to the rest of the survivors? "One of them, his name is Boone Carlyle, suffered tremendous internal injuries and died a few days after the crash. A woman, Libby, she didn't make it through the first week. Charlie Pace, he drowned a few weeks before we were able to leave." Hmmmm... That's an odd list. Hurley says he doesn't want his millions back. Someone asks Sayid if he'll return to Iraq. Someone pries about Kate's pregnancy. After the conference, Sayid is told he has a visitor. He walks outside where Nadia awaits. At the beach Sayid lands with the zodiac. He tells everyone he will start ferrying people six at a time to the freighter. Juliet tells him Jack and Kate went after the chopper. "Well, fuck," says Sayid. In the jungle Hurley asks about the Orchid. It's a greenhouse. Why are they going there? "You heard John. We're going to move the island." Okay. Why didn't they do that before the mercenaries showed up? "Because doing it is both dangerous and unpredictable. It's a measure of last resort." Swell. At the foot of a mountain, Ben kicks over some rocks and pulls out a suitcase. He pulls a mirror out and starts signalling to the top of the hill. A mirror flickers back. Locke asks what he said. None of your business, Ben tells him. Ouch. At the beach Faraday tells Sayid he will ferry people to the boat if he wants to go after Jack. Kate comes out of the jungle with Aaron. She says she can track Jack and Sawyer and hands Aaron to Sun. Kate and Sayid head back into the jungle. Flash forward and Sun visits her father at his office. He asks about the baby. "Don't pretend to be interested in my baby. We both know you hated my husband." Ouch. Dad gets pissed and tells her she will show him respect. "Oceanic paid us our settlement for the crash. It was very significant. This morning, I bought a controlling interest in your company. So you will now respect me." Ouch again. "You ruined my husband's life. It is because of you we were on that plane. Two people are responsible for his death. You are one of them." Triple ouch. Meanwhile, in California, Hurley pulls up in front of his mansion in a clunker automobile. The front door is opened. He walks inside and sees a coconut on the floor. He hears whispering. Uh oh. He throws open another door. "Surprise!" Oh, it's just his birthday luau. Luau? Ouch. Mom and dad are there. So is Jack, and Sayid is there with Nadia. Kate has brought Aaron. Dad says he has a gift for Hurley. He takes him to the garage and shows him the Camaro. "After the crash, I worked on it as a memorial to you." Hurley gets behind the wheel and stares at the dash. The odometer reads 481516. The trip counter is at 234.2. What the fuck? Hurley freaks out. Outside the Orchid, Hurley asks Ben about moving the island. "But suppose somehow it works, and we move the island. Doesn't that mean the dudes with guns move, too?" Ben assures him he's working on that. He tells Hurley and Locke to get down as he peers at the station through his binoculars. He tells them Widmore knows that what they need is in the station. He hands the glasses to Locke who spies mercenaries surrounding the station. Faraday drops the first raftload of survivors off at the freighter. He tells Desmond that Sayid has gone after the chopper. Michael tells them the engines are fixed. The first mate fires up the boat. Desmond tells him to take them to the island. "We've got some kind of RF interference with the fathometer. I can't see the reef, mate. Something on this boat is broadcasting. If we don't turn it off, I'm not going any closer than five miles off the coast." Dez says not to worry, he'll find the source of the interference. In the jungle Sawyer and Jack find the copter. Frank is handcuffed in to the passenger hold. Jack asks where Desmond and Sayid are. On the boat, Frank says. Frank needs to get loose so he can fly them out of here before Keamy gets back. He explains that Keamy is going to snatch Ben and kill whoever he is with. "Hugo's with Ben," Sawyer says. Shit! Jack has his wake for his father. He says he loved him and misses him. After, a woman approaches him. She says she was the reason Old Man Shephard was in Australia. He was there to visit his daughter. Jack is all, what the fuck? "Would you like to know the strangest thing about all this, Mr. Shephard? My daughter was on your plane, too. She was one of the ones who died when your plane hit the water. Her name was Claire." Oh jebus. Jack tears up and looks across the room at Kate and Aaron. On the freighter Sun and Jin throw Michael some dirty looks. He tries to explain. They ask if he works for Ben now. No, he pleads, he's just trying to make up for what he did. Then Desmond interrupts (someone is always interrupting on this show) and tells Michael he needs to come down to the hull right now. Meanwhile, Alpert and the Others capture Sayid and Kate. Well, Shit. At the Orchid, Ben tells Locke to head into the greenhouse, find the secret door in an alcove behind some anthuriums. I hope Locke studied his botany. Locke asks how the fuck he's supposed to get past the mercs. Bwn reminds Locke that he always has a plan. Then he walks into the Orchid and says to Keamy "My name is Benjamin Linus. I believe you're looking for me."

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